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Archive for March, 2004

Signs, Signs, everywhere the signs

March 31, 2004 - Posted by Bobby - No Comments »

I thought I would help educate all of you on some of the signs you run into here on Grand Cayman. These will help you all not to get arrested while visiting or smuggling drugs from South America…

They will follow this format:
What I think the sign means = What it actually means

Viagra Ahead!
*Kicks ass new advert campaign for Viagra = The road will curve*

seriously, merge into each other?
*Jesus, which lane is supposed to merge!? = Jesus, which lane is supposed to merge!?*

round and round we go
*Yield to tornados = ROUNDABOUT! (Hold on and jump in)*

MPH
*The twenty fifth hole on the frisbee golf course = Speed limit*

ichy nasty arm bumps
*HERPES!!!! = This is a reminder sign that we live on a freakin swamp and two seconds outside near the bush can provoke severe mosquito attacks*

I’d like to thank the signs for standing still while I shot them and for Wendi for donating her bumpy arm to a good cause ~LATER

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187 on a muthfuckin cop

March 30, 2004 - Posted by Bobby - No Comments »

This post is all about the PoPo, the Pigs, the boys in blue, the peeps that keep tryin to keep a brotha down…THE POLICE! I love the police. My sisters a detective. I even have a bachelors degree in criminal justice. Police are good people with higher than normal amounts of testosterone.

I heard there is a new unit in the OPD force…here is the new logo

OPD, yeah you know me

These bastards have the tedious task of searching my website for tit shots and hot chicks. Well, the old site (still in the process of being archived here) had loads of that stuff and naturally, this site will slowly follow suit. I went ahead and made your job easy by posting this picture taken at the Attic Billiard Lounge here in Grand Cayman. Now it cost me the price of one shot of Jagermeister to get er done, so you boys owe me when I come visit this summer.

boobs, just boobs

Get back to work, there’s tons of gangbangers eagerly shooting each other as we speak. Oh wait, keep pissing away time – we want them to kill each other. Homicide is just so much more complete than a simple wounding.

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EDUCATION = POWER (Rap Snacks Verbage)

March 29, 2004 - Posted by Bobby - No Comments »

That’s right folks – Dust off the bongs and count your change for penny pitchers, I’m back in College! I start my first class this evening for my MBA at the International College of The Cayman Islands. I am sure that I will be a stellar student and THE Van Wilder of the Islands.

On another note – Britney Spears SUCKS! I watched her stupid concert last night with the same hopes that every male had. Seriously, any guy over the age of 11 knows the only point for Showtime is to show some low budget booby movies with Lifetime plots. So what the hell was she doing on Showtime with her clothes on? Plus I think she may have actually sang one song on her own without the help of the pre-recorded, highly synthesized Milli Vanilli machine. TWO WORDS FOR YOU BRITNEY – “Show Your Boobs, then stop singing!”

…Britney put both of us to sleep…
am I human or dog?

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Casualities of War

March 26, 2004 - Posted by Bobby - No Comments »

(SPOTLIGHT NOTE: Added Ben “Fatty” Mahan today (16 total in rotation now))

We had to say goodbye to a good woman last night…Private First Class Mass passed away shortly after 5pm in her on going battle against poor tank conditions, floating turds, and general lack of oxygen. She will surely be missed (but replaced this weekend with a new, stronger soldier!)

miss you
—Mass meets her maker in the porcelain graveyard—
liqour for the dead homey
—pouring out some liqour for the dead homey—

On a lighter note, from the BOBBYLOVEVILLE mail bag we heard from AMANDA (the hottest thing to ever touch the Lone Star Bar & Grill). She’s still kickin it out in Australia and wants to say “HI” to everyone!

Nicky-Ginn dropped a line from somewhere in Canada (exact location unknown; isn’t it just one big land mass of shit?) He is pissed that I haven’t yet linked him on the links pages, but it will soon come – here’s a tease SICK AMONG THE PURE“>SICK AMONG THE PURE

I also heard from Andy Marriott…apparently he is still in bed from the brutal bubbly booze beating he took on St. Patrick’s Day! Oh what we’d to have our 18 year old livers back. He dropped me a line about some bitchin new club called Nico“>Nico in Omaha. They’re site isn’t built quite yet, but maybe an influx of hits will encourage them to get off their lazy arses. It sounds like a bitchin place, but maybe about 5-7 years ahead of its time for Omaha.

~LATER

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TODAY’S RANT: Stupid People

March 25, 2004 - Posted by Bobby - No Comments »

fuckin idiots
I hate stupid people. I really hate stupid people that don’t know they’re stupid and I can’t stand stupid people that don’t know they’re stupid but act as if they are smart. We’ve all encountered these idiots of the ages. They wander through life, some quite successfully, and never get a grasp on what the fuck is going on. They chime in when your having intellectual conversations and try to add their two cents…they’re completely off subject, worthless two damned cents. They always seem to know the answers to everything. If everything is actually nothing, then they probably do. They take a class or read somthing in a book and then immediatley have to use that information on everyone within the next 24 hours, just before it blows out the other end of their empty head. They try their hardest to be witty and clever and instead come off as being dull and slightly retarded. They love monotonous tasks and believe that these tasks actually portray a level of intelligence when we all know that a monkey could do the same task with alot less chatter. I hate them. I don’t mind stupid people that know they are stupid. They can actually be kind of fun. So please if you are stupid, just admit it and live your stupid life. THANKS!

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